#fun fact! these maps are pretty OLD

[succikko-draws]

If you were curious about where they're all located on the Weink planets there you go + Each city's emblem

Below's the setup of their worlds - why one is called South and the other North would be so long to explain so for now just take it besties ♥ In case the color coding isn't obvious, first map is North Weink, 2nd one is South Weink

[sometimesanequine]

interesting time to have a get too stressed and have your body try to kill you thing going on today, ocean life and ocean ecosystem documentaries save me

[meganegatari]

THE WAY YOU WRITE IS JUST SO YUMMM so yeah🧍🏻‍♀️can you write something about streamer ellie <33

☆: IM SO SORRY FOR THE WAIT. definitelyyyy hasn't been...months...anyway. positive this is one of the worse things i've written, but didn't wanna leave you hanging forever! ngl it's pretty filthy..heh.

◇: 18+ pretend those twitch guideline things don't exist. remote control vibrator use, orgasm denial, sub-ish!ellie?? plot twist at the end bc i think im so funny. 1.6k wc. don't mind the layout of this idk what else to do...

You watch your girlfriend stream her game from your fluffy and comfortable spot on your shared bed—you observe how focused she was on her screen, how her skilled fingers were flying across the keyboard and mouse. It would certainly be a shame to disturb her in such a high tension moment but you think it over, running your finger over the small buttons of the sleek little remote in your hand.

"Yeah, yeah, got 'em! Look at that guys, I fuckin’ aced that!" Ellie rejoices in her victory, and gleefully boasts to her viewers, adjusting her microphone closer and leaning back in her chair.

You're glad you were far off camera, her fans didn't even know she was in a relationship—Ellie made it clear she wanted you to be separate from her hobbies, not because she wanted to keep you a secret, but because she wanted to keep you safe. And you enjoyed watching her stream from the sidelines like this, you saw how her personality captivated viewers and how much fun she really was. But you also enjoyed messing with her on the occasion. Like today.

"Can I watch tonight's stream again?" You asked her eagerly. "Yeah, why not? I'll be doing some tournaments and stuff though, so no distractions." Oops. You bit back a laugh. Ellie immediately sussed out the mischievous look on your face and she sighed, expecting the worst.

Then you showed her the box you've been hiding, "Please let's try, I won't click it too much, I promise." She stared at you for a whole minute, maybe more, before sighing and reluctantly agreeing, rubbing her hands all over her face. "God, fine. Just 'cause I love you. Damn you're evil."

Fast forward to now—the device was snugly inserted inside her pretty pussy, tested out to prove it does in fact work, and works well at that.

So off Ellie went to play her game, getting so caught up in everything she seemingly forgot about the device entirely. In between games she was talking to the viewers, reading the chat and joking back and forth. You decided it was a good enough time to click it so you pressed the button, only for a miniscule zap.

She jerked in her seat, gasping, but quickly recovered with a strategic cough. "Phew sorry guys, something got caught in my throat." You saw a bright berry blush spread across her face, and the way she fought to turn and throw a glare at you. This was going to be fun.

"Alright, the next round’s gonna start, we gotta lock in! Hopefully nothing pops up and this goes smoothly. I can taste the win already.” She put a certain warning tone to her voice in the last part of her sentence, you knew it was meant for you, but were you going to listen? Absolutely not. "Oh yeah chat fun fact, this old area of the map was inspired by ancient ruins just of—ah!" As if her body had a mind of its own, she squirmed in her seat and she clapped her hand over her mouth to stifle a moan when you hit it again, but this time you didn't turn it off right away. You kept it going for a few more seconds, to prolong the terribly delicious sensation.

She screwed her eyes shut tightly and held her breath until you turned it off, mumbling to her viewers about "having hiccups". "The game is starting now, so we really gotta get serious." Her voice had an unsteadiness to it only you could hear, she was keeping her composure rather well so far. But likely wouldn't be able to keep up the act for much longer. Even she has her limits.

As her match went on, she got quiet when she was focused, mashing the keys with a speed fast as sound. Of course, you hit it again, just a short one, causing a choked "guh" to escape from her lips and she twitched when you did so, her facade starting to crack. The effort to keep her voice stable was showing, she was huffing and struggling to get her words out clearly, they were laced with obvious irritation.

"Fuck missed the shot, dammit. Yeah I don't know, somethings up today, sorry guys...off my game." You decided to be nice to her until the game ended, not pressing it further or adjusting the intensity. She played for a little while longer before losing the match, leaning forward on the desk with her face in her hands. This was the perfect moment, so you cranked it up, increased the intensity to maximum, and held the button for the longest time yet, making her whine—a low, drawn out sound she couldn't stifle this time.

You could hear lots of messages being sent, pings in rapid succession, they were probably clipping that moment. Perverts, you thought. 

Her chest was noticeably heaving up and down, her legs spread as she rocks her front against the chair, and she kept her head lowered until you decreased the intensity but didn't turn it all the way off. Her hands were shaking, and her face was a vibrant cherry red, the screen even reflected the sparkle of a couple tears in her eyes.

“What? Oh, I'm just so sad about the loss guys, we were so close—hnn- so…so closeahh—I mean, we should've gotten that…” She trailed off, chewing on her bottom lip and tapping her fingers on the desk’s wooden surface. “Y’know what, I'll be right back.” She paused the stream, made triple sure her camera and microphone were turned off, then whipped around in her chair to face you, glaring silver daggers your way.

You just giggled innocently and turned the device off again. “What the fuck is wrong with you, this shit is not- not light on you at all.” Her voice was breaking, her pretty features contorted in a beautifully needy expression, eyebrows furrowed and eyes all watery. Nearly as wet as the mess in her pants. You feigned innocence and shrugged at her, “Well I didn't know it was that strong.” “You knew damn well.” She's fed up with your antics, but you have fun playing with her. She covers her face and leans back in the chair, the embarrassment in her voice the only thing you could hear, “Fuck you...turn it up again, wanna cum.”

You couldn't contain the laugh that burst forth from your chest, then said, “Only if you stream it.” The shock that flickered across her face was priceless, you wish you could have snapped a photo.

“What the fuck do you mean by that, nah forget it.”

“Hey, you gotta finish your stream either way, they're waiting. Would you wanna be so awful and deprive those darlings of your presence?”

You flash her a sugary smile, and she shoots you a murderous look again, before wordlessly scooting back to her setup, fanning herself briefly and readjusting her coppery hair.

Then she turns the stream back on. “Sorry guys, I had to get up for a second. Anyway, let's play one more game. I'm getting kinda tired today. Let's make this one count, lock in like never before.” She takes a deep breath, cracks her knuckles, and begins smacking away at the keyboard buttons. You're able to see the way she looks tense, on edge, anticipating your devilish interruption.

You debate whether you should torture her, but the answer quickly becomes clear. Click.

“Ah—fuck!” She sputters, and roughly slams her fist on the desk. The pleasure was hitting her with full force, she was in her own, lewd, world now. Her head is thrown back, back arched and hips stuttering, the release was about to sneak up on her.

You watch the scenario unfold, licking your lips and pressing your thighs together to deal with the pressure between them. Her unapologetic moans get louder, but for a second she snaps out of the trance to sit back upright, turn the stream off, before the peak hits her like a truck.

“Holy, fu—hah!!” With a squeal she cums, not caring about how fucking loud she was being, wanting to be selfishly absorbed in ecstasy.

She started to jolt around in her seat, the throes of overstimulation making her whimper like an animal in heat, it truly was a sight to behold. You wish you were in between her legs, lapping up her sweetness straight from the source, but in a way, just watching from the sidelines was satisfying enough. You'll clean her up afterward.

Finally you turned it off once and for all, and gazed at her, she was panting heavily, the post-orgasm glow making her rosy skin shimmer in the low light.

“Hmmm, thanks babe, that was so good…” She tried to talk, her head was in the clouds, but she looked at peace.

“You're a whore.” You chortled, and you two shared a laugh.

Although, a flurry of shrill sounds brought you both out of the fantasy. Ping, ping, ping.

Unfortunately she wasn't able to enjoy the aftermath of a mind-numbing session, because her eyes shot open and she began scrambling to find the source of the sound. Your stomach dropped as you watched her panic, her neuroticism infectious.

She looked at you, her eyes wider than saucers, nothing but fear in her voice, “I wasn't able to turn my mic off…”

What was she going to do now?

if you'd like to be tagged in my fics, click here! thank you for reading. asks, reblogs, and comments are appreciated more than you know. ♡

tags: @andersonfilms @ch6douin @aouiaa @sapphic-ovaries @astro-cat2 @paqerings @r3starttt @littlefallenangel111 @sinfulprayerss @lvlymicha @sunnsh1ine @anniee333 @pinkcwake @marsworlddd @caszzine @saturnsdrafts @ashaynep @mascdom @xysbree @liddysflyer @fortune777 @brunaedn @bunnitewsilly @mimasroom2 @deliriousrn @infiniteinquiries @thekill3randthefinalgirl @kissyslut @elliesapple

[g1rld1ary]

you never disappointed me ; luke castellan x aphrodite!reader

part one part two part three part four

➻ synopsis: charles beckendorf wants to go out with silena beauregard more than anything. one problem: she's not allowed to date until her shrewish older sister does, so he and percy come up with a plan. (10 things I about you AU)

➻ word count: 2783

➻ warnings: swearing ooc/kind of loser!luke, ooc silena, she/her pronouns used for reader

➻ this'll be a few chapter so this is p1!!!

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

Charles Beckendorf arrived at Camp Half-Blood when he was fifteen years old. It was a wonder he’d lasted out in the mortal world so long with his significant stature, height enough to attract monsters, but Percy — his tour guide — guessed it was probably his more reserved nature which had kept him under the radar.

“Thank God it’s you showing me around,” Was one of the first things he’d said, “When you start things like this it’s usually all the kiss-asses that greet me.” With six schools under his belt, Percy knew what he meant all too well.

“Nah man, we’re chill. And if we get this done quick then you can meet my friends, we know how to have the real fun here.”

And so they embarked on their tour, Percy dutifully pointing out all the most important places around camp. First was the Dining Pavilion, where they met Grover as he chewed on some of the tin-can remains of lunch. Then came Thalia’s Tree, under which Annabeth was drawing out a map that Charles didn’t understand in the slightest but Percy explained was a strategy for capture the flag. After that they walked past the sword fighting arena, where they caught a glimpse of Luke in the middle of a fierce duel. They both passed quickly, and Charles got the distinct impression that you weren’t supposed to interrupt Luke when he was fighting.

As the two got to the lake, Percy explaining it was where most people hung out when they had the time, Charles faltered in his steps. Percy looked back to where he was frozen and followed his sightline to Silena Beauregard and rolled his eyes.

“Who is that?” He breathed.

“Don’t even bother, bro,” Percy replied. “She’s off limits. It’s a well known fact that the Beauregard sisters aren’t allowed to date — they’re only here over the summers and their dad is crazy strict about it for some reason.”

“But she’s so—”

“Self-centred? Shallow? Silena is all looks no substance, dude. You can do better.” Percy ushered him away but Charles was still daydreaming about the beautiful Aphrodite girl.

The tour was just finishing up by the Climbing Wall when they first saw you. You held the camp record for it, and so had been delegated the responsibility of teaching the younger kids. Today though you’d had to rescue a cocky bastard from getting obliterated by lava, singeing the fabric of your camp shirt all over your left shoulder, and you were not in a good mood.

Just wanting to get back to your cabin for a change of clothes and some ambrosia, you were certainly not in the state of mind to stop and chat with a new camper. So when Percy and Charles came along blocking the whole fucking path, you didn’t hesitate to yell “Move!” Pushing past them in a huff. You wouldn’t usually be so rude, but you were pretty sure your shirt was fusing into your skin which was so not what you needed. Plus, they were in the way. Beckendorf’s bicep was warm from where you’d shoulder-checked him with your injury.

“That’s your dream girl’s older sister,” Percy snorted, used to your disagreeable personality.

“That’s Silena’s sister?” Charles asked incredulously, “But she’s…”

“A shrew? Yeah. I’d watch out for her, and kiss your dreams of going out with Silena goodbye. Now c’mon, I’ll show you to your cabin.” Charles followed mindlessly, still thinking about the two Beauregard sisters.

When people thought of you, the consensus was pretty much this: Silena Beauregard’s older sister, and the most heinous bitch at Camp Half-Blood, a title you were extremely proud of. Whilst you really didn’t think you were that bad — in fact, you considered your actions quite reasonable — younger campers cowered away when you marched through camp and the older ones rolled their eyes when you spoke. Just the way you liked it. It wasn’t exactly unusual, camp had all sorts of kids living there, not everyone was going to get along, but it was pretty unexpected for you as a daughter of Aphrodite.

You didn’t get along with most of your siblings, despite all your efforts as one of the elder campers. You thought it was ridiculous that they wouldn’t participate in camp activities, regardless of the reason. What good was having all that beauty if it was wiped off the face of the earth by a monster? There were a hundred rumours flying about to explain you and your attitude, the most popular being that you were the secret lovechild of Aphrodite and Ares, which explained your affinity for fighting and permanent bitch face. You knew better. For one you shared too many of your dad’s traits not to be his child. Plus, Aphrodite had a long history of being associated with war in Ancient Greece which everyone at camp just conveniently forgot in favour of writing her children off as useless and vain. You hated it, and you refused to be who they wanted.

Even your favourite sibling was the polar opposite to you. Silena was a few years younger than you, and by all accounts was the model of a perfect Aphrodite child. Gorgeous, of course, and usually kind and patient. In your opinion, she was kind of annoying and self-absorbed, but you chose to believe she meant well so you could keep tolerating her. You didn’t know how the only two blood-related siblings in your cabin could be so different from one another, but it had been that way since you were fourteen and she was twelve.

You had made it back to your cabin, and your shoulder was all bandaged up after your shower. You were just flipping through The Bell Jar, your latest novel, when Silena came stomping into the cabin, waving a letter frantically through the air. You could assume what it was about.

“This is so unfair!” Silena whined, “Daddy doesn’t even know Ethan!” Ethan was the new boy Silena had been obsessed with recently, writing incessantly to your father in an attempt to get him to take back the no dating rule.

“What, can’t go swap spit with the vermin of the earth?” You exaggerated a pout. She sneered at you in the mirror.

“Worse. Now he’s saying I can’t date until you do, so now I’m going to die a stupid old virgin because of you!” You rolled your eyes and sighed.

“Have you ever considered there’s more to life than finding a boyfriend? Or, big shock I know, maybe I’m just not interested in the sweaty, uninspired pigs that are supplied here?”

“You suck!” She huffed, turning on a kitten heel and barging out of the cabin.

“You suck!” You mocked, turning back to your book. You knew Silena was really pissed at you for being so stubborn, but you hated the thought of changing your opinions over a man of all things.

Silena, in her frustration, was wandering around Camp Half-Blood to let off some steam. Charles, fresh from a kayaking lesson, spotted her across the beach and scrambled to catch up to her. Remembering what Percy told him about her not participating in many of the camp’s activities, he came up with the idea to offer his help to finish a project in the forges to get Chiron off her back. Silena seemed surprised but happy enough to agree, and Charles was ecstatic.

“She’s agreed to go to the forges with me!” He told Percy excitedly, and Percy raised an eyebrow.

“Do you even know how to weld?”

“Well, no, but I will!” As much as Percy liked the new kid, he was definitely a handful.

Charles’ first session with Silena didn’t go exactly as he’d hoped. She showed up already looking bored, and not keen to start off with a simple sword as he’d proposed. Soon he gave up with any welding, choosing instead to try and get her know better.

“If you’re not really into this we could try something else? I saw someone welding some metal flowers, you know, for like a date?” That caught her attention.

“Are you asking me on a date?” At his shy nod Silena couldn’t contain her slight laugh. “That is so cute! What’s your name again?” Charles told her quietly.

“Well, my Dad’s just changed our family rule — I can date when my sister does.”

“That’s great! So all you’ve gotta do is find someone who’ll date her!”

“One problem, Cameron-”

“Charles.”

“My sister is, like, totally antisocial?”

“Yeah, but people jump out of planes and stuff all the time! It could be, like, extreme dating!”

They both looked across the forge where you were working, fixing up your favourite sword after an Ares kid had done quite a number on it. You had on both your signature outfit and expression — long, practical jorts with your camp shirt tied in a knot and a dangerous bitch face.

“The oversized look is out, Beauregard, didn’t you read last month’s Vogue?” Ethan was hovering around you, trying his hardest to get a rise out of you in front of his friends.

“Run along, dickwad.” You refused to blow up at him, knowing it would only be used to make you look hysterical and unbalanced later. Plus, Ethan would get bored sooner or later and find someone else to taunt.

As Charles recounted this story to Percy later that night at the bonfire, all Percy could do was groan.

“Charles — Charlie — I really wanna like you, man, but this is probably the most stupid thing you could have done. I know they’re hot, but it’s not even worth getting involved with one Beauregard sister, and you’ve just gotten yourself tangled with both — and not in the way that most guys dream about.” Charles flushed at the innuendo.

“I think you’re wrong about Silena, I think she’s worth it. I just have to figure out how I can set her sister up with another guy.”

“Yeah, good luck with that,” Percy laughed, hitting Charles’ knee twice before turning away to talk to Annabeth. Charles spent the rest of the night trying to hatch a plan.

Early the next morning he got Percy on board, albeit very reluctantly. Percy brought Charles over to every single guy he could think of in your age range, begging them to take you out. The responses varied from a nervous shake of the head to Travis Stoll laughing in both boys’ faces.

“Why would I go looking for a kick in the balls?” He asked, still wheezing from his initial outburst.

They found themselves once again at the bonfire, both disheartened. Percy at having wasted a day all for this new guy he barely knew, and Charles that he was no closer to getting a date with Silena. Finally, somewhat eager to get this distraction over with, Percy came up with an idea.

“What about you just pay someone to go out with her?” He asked, and Charles considered the idea for a minute, it wasn’t half bad.

“I have literally no money,” He settled on finally, and Percy rolled his eyes.

“So you get someone else to do it for you,” He suggested, and Annabeth joined the conversation with suspicious interest.

“Like a backer?” She asked, at Percy’s nod she bit her lip, “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, guys, it seems like it could really backfire on you. I mean, what if she finds out? I heard she once tied a camper to the lava wall just for looking at her wrong.”

“She won’t find out! I mean she only has to date so Silena can, it doesn’t have to be a long term thing. She goes on enough dates for it to qualify, then they break up while it’s still casual and I can go out with Silena!” Charles explained excitedly, but Annabeth still looked skeptical.

“Plus, if we have a backer, none of the blame will go to my man Charlie here,” Percy added helpfully, which swayed Annabeth a little.

“Okay, well be careful,” She said, leaving for the dining hall to be distanced from the plot.

Percy thought the answer to who the backer would be was pretty obvious. Whilst most of the boys at Camp Half-Blood wanted to sleep with Silena, Ethan White was both rich and desperate enough to agree to it. Plus when Percy Jackson was telling you you’d look great with a girl, you generally listened.

All that was left was to find someone to set you up with. The boys used the bonfire to scope out their options, but it wasn’t looking good. For one, you didn’t even show up to bonfires if you could help it, and it was anyone’s guess what you did instead. Rumours said blood sacrifices but Percy was almost completely sure that was a lie. Truthfully you were sitting up on the roof of the Aphrodite cabin, enjoying the peace and quiet of the camp when no one else was around.

They were about to give up, Percy trying to find the right words to let Beckendorf down easy, when they saw Luke. Luke, with his brooding eyes and his cigarette, sitting on his own at the bonfire with headphones connected to a mortal mp3 player. Luke, who had never quite been the same since he returned from his quest — rumours swirling about the horrors he’d faced that he refused to speak on.

“I think we’ve found our man.”

It was easy to convince Ethan to get on board, he was so overconfident in himself and his looks he would never suspect that Percy or Beckendorf had any ulterior motives. It was equally enjoyable to watch Ethan try and approach Luke to get the plan in motion. Percy and Beckendorf were sitting with Percy’s friends on the beach the very first time Ethan spoke to Luke. He was all macho confidence, still trying to play the tough guy. Luke looked up at him from his place sitting on a rock, barely moving his head to give him any attention. The moment of eye contact meant Ethan knew Luke had seen him speaking, and the abrupt walking away communicated his absolute lack of interest. It took a gargantuan effort from Percy not to burst out laughing then and there.

The second conversation went a bit smoother. Ethan had a metaphorical tail between his legs, temporarily giving up his ego to be the smaller person in the conversation. That got Luke’s attention, having known Ethan and his antics for years at that point. And then Ethan explained his plan. Luke couldn’t contain his laughter — a sound Camp Half-Blood was rarely graced with anymore.

“Yeah sure, Sparky,” He laughed, almost wheezing in an uncharacteristic show of emotion.

“Look,” Ethan stressed, “I can’t take out Silena until her sister starts dating — their Dad is super strict and has this rule—”

“Touching story, not my problem.” Luke moved to put his earbud back in when Ethan stopped him.

“Could it be your problem if I provided generous compensation?” Luke had forgotten Ethan’s mother was filthy rich. He looked him dead in the eye.

“You’re going to pay me to take out some chick? How much?” He asked, entirely disbelieving.

“Twenty bucks” They both looked down at you on the volleyball courts, spiking a ball into a girl’s stomach with so much force she keeled over on the ground. You had the decency to look mildly apologetic while the opposing team glared at you.

“Fine. Thirty.”

“Let’s see,” Luke smiled something devious. “If I’m taking her out it means leaving camp. That’s a lot of risk I’m pursuing for you, plus the costs of taking to her somewhere — the movies maybe. And you know inflation lately, let’s say seventy-five bucks.”

“This isn’t a negotiation, burnout.”

“Fifty bucks and we’ve got a deal, Fabio,” Luke countered, knowing he had the upper hand. He had nothing to lose. Reluctantly, Ethan forked out a fifty. All that was left was for Luke to get you to go out with him, how hard could that be?

[coldbronzemoon]

And Now We're Back to Get Some More

A fic for @aroace-get-out-of-my-face 's fic "A Good Day to Die (Again)".

I just want these sadsacks to have a good time on their mini-road trip. This can be found on Ao3 too.

There was a lull in conversation in the car. It was not the first, and probably won’t be the last. Ford was grateful to have Stanley here in the car with him—so, so grateful, if whatever being that caused the time loop, should they exist, ever revealed itself to him he’d do whatever it demanded with no questions—but filling silence for multiple hours straight was still a tall task.

Both their voices were a bit raspy five hours in. Stan was still driving; Ford tried to persuade his brother to let him take the wheel on account of the bad bruise on Stan’s arm from being tackled to the ground during their reunion, but Stan stalwartly refused.

So Ford was in the passenger’s seat with the map, watching the cusps of trees on the side of the highway grow into woods and forests the further north they traveled. It was a pretty sight, most of the drive. He didn’t have the chance to admire it while he was driving down south dozens of times.

His heart jolted in his chest, thinking of the last week. The many last weeks. He looked at Stanley, for a second utterly convinced that the loop would reset and Ford would wake up and scream himself hoarse for a minute because dammit, he did it, he did it, don’t fucking take this from him and steal a car and drive and drive and drive and make it to the casino just to see Stan get shot through the head—

But Stanley was there, one hand on the wheel and the other arm braced on the rolled-down window like a trucker. There wasn’t any blood or bone fragments or brain splatter. He was just sitting there, squinting out at the road. He probably shouldn't be squinting, they weren’t facing the sun at the moment. 

He opened his mouth, intending to ask about that. But he happened to look out the window at the sky, and it was the time of the year that the moon was visible in the sky in the day, and his brain leapt from the moon, to the stars, to the smoggy, dark canopy of sky over Glass Shard Beach, to them as children giving up on the real sky and looking at star charts instead.

“Tell me about Castor and Pollux,” he said.

It had been an old… not game, exactly, but an old pastime. The two of them had both liked Greek mythology when they were younger—for Stan it had mostly been an interest in the wars and magical powers and warriors with swords, but he suffered Ford’s interest in other parts of the mythology too. Ford would tell him all about a god, and Stanley would remember it. 

Then he’d tell the tales he learned back to Ford. He was much better at making them proper stories than Ford, who always talked about things like a series of facts. Stanley made them fun.

When had their last round of myths been told? Ford thought it might’ve been around thirteen. Stan had braces then, and Ford hadn’t gotten his yet. He thought that his last recollection of Stanley telling Greek myths involved the lisp he gained for that period of time.

Pollux had been Polluc’shhh. Because it had been Castor and Pollux then, too. That had been their favorite constellation myth.

Twins, boxers, sailors. It was like they were cast in the image of those two gods. Back then, they would jokingly plot to change their names to Castor and Pollux after they sailed away, because anything was better than Stan and Stan, and get into scuffles over who had to be Castor and who got to be Pollux.

After all, Pollux was the immortal one. Ford would insist on Stan being Pollux if they were to fight over it again. Maybe Stan was already Pollux, in a way. What was a time loop if not a form of immortality?

Stanley blinked out of his harsh squint and glanced at him for a moment. Only a moment; Ford had already given him hell for keeping his eyes off the road because he was not dying in a car crash after everything.

“When the hell did you turn into resin, you sap,” Stan said.

“Are you going to tell me about them or not?” Ford said, ignoring the question entirely. The answer would be the moment I realized you could really die, and for now they were ignoring the amount of death that had happened for their collective sanity.

Stan sighed, a grand production, and said, “Alright, lessee if I remember anything...”

“Keep your eyes on the road while you remember,” Ford said.

He unfolded the map in his lap even though they had miles before any exits as Stan sighed and hummed and clicked his tongue just to be annoying. Ford was annoyed, which was annoying in of itself, but fondness overtook everything else.

“Right, stop me if I get it wrong, but Castor and Pollux, they were these twin brothers. Real hotshots, handsome as hell, as all twins are—”

Ford laughed. He had forgotten that Stan always started the myth like that. He wouldn’t have remembered it without Stan doing it again, and the thought unsettled him for a second.

But it was alright that Ford had forgotten. It was alright, because Stan was here, and telling the story again, and he’d always be here to do everything Ford had forgotten he did because nothing like what happened in that casino parking lot was ever allowed to happen again.

He settled into the seat of the El Diablo and let Stanley’s guff voice wash over him. 

-----------------------------

At some point into Stan’s recollection of the lives of Castor and Pollux, which had slid into a recollection of a group of bikers Stan had run with in his early twenties, Stan abruptly stopped talking and pointed out a billboard.

Ford blinked awake from what wasn’t exactly a nap—he was still listening to Stanley—but nearly counted as one. He almost missed the billboard, and for a second was sure he misread it as it passed by.

The billboard declared that on an upcoming exit there was a “TRAIN OF TAXIDERMY”, featuring a picture of a rundown-looking set of boxcars that presumably held the taxidermy.

“That looks shitty as hell,” Stan said gleefully. “We should go see it.”

“They’re going to charge us twenty dollars each to look at stuffed rabbits,” Ford said.

“Sure are. We should go anyway. I’ve always seen signs for these stupid things and never gone.”

Ford considered Stanley from the corner of his eye. His brother could pay for his own fee with his casino winnings, so that wasn’t a problem… Ford remembered Stanley always having a fascination with this sort of thing. He’d happily point out any dead animals they saw in the area and listen on as Ford poked them with sticks and tried to determine the cause of death.

It wasn’t like Ford hadn’t also enjoyed himself. Hell, maybe the place would have some genuinely decent taxidermy, which would be interesting to look at. Maybe it’d even have something cursed!

“Why not?” he said. “Let’s go see it. It’ll add, what, an hour getting back?”

Stanley whooped with delight as Ford bent over the map and marked the exit for the Train of Taxidermy with a red marker Stan kept in the glove compartment. 

The tourist trap was easy to find on account of the multiple signs pointing out where to go and clarifying how many miles more to get to it. The sight of the wooden pointing arms and faded white letters claiming to “shock” and “amaze” filled Ford with a rush of nostalgia for the boardwalk carnival of their childhood.

Coming up on the train itself—a bold claim, really, it was three boxcars set on an abandoned track, all of them painted lurid colors—was a slightly disappointing sight after all the fanfare. Stan and Ford got out of the car and made their way to the wooden stall near the parking lot for the site anyway. The pair were still riding the wave of getting out of an endless prison of death and were determined to enjoy themselves.

They engaged with the tourist trap’s cashier with a level of enthusiasm and ecstasy that had the bored teenage employee scrutinizing them with narrowed eyes, probably looking for signs of a different kind of ecstasy.

Still, they were directed to enter any boxcar they chose despite the wary look. Ford had no doubt that it had less to do with the girl being sure they were drug-free and more to do with the fact she wasn’t paid enough to care either way.

The hot pink boxcar was the closest one, and boasted “HUGE RACKS AND IMPRESSIVE BODIES”. Stan marched ahead to that one without Ford’s input, and Ford was forced to follow after.

He supposed he could’ve chosen to take one of the cars not emblazoned with a suggestive slogan, but that would require letting Stanley out of his sight. And that simply wasn’t going to happen.

It turned out that the car was mostly filled with deer, and dear Moses, they were awful. Stan was already cackling at the utterly hideous buck’s head that was mounted on the far wall, whose expression in death could only be described as ‘perturbed’. There were multiple doe in the car as well, posed in what was probably supposed to be frolicing motions, but looked more like seizures. The fur and skin were obviously stitched together from several deer, and yet it seemed far too tight over the false bone and muscle inside.

“I could do better,” Stan said, prodding at the buck’s antlers. There was no one around to stop him from doing it. “These things were obviously glued on—if you’re gonna do that, go big! Give it twenty antlers! Put up a plaque saying it grew a new set every year, ‘cept the last set never fell off.”

“Deer live ten years at best,” Ford pointed out, studying the buck as well. The glass eyes had an almost hypnotic quality despite being set into the eye sockets like the maker had just thrown them haphazardly and hoped they’d stick.

Stan shrugged, grinning. “So it was a half-immortal deer on top of the antler thing. Double the fun.”

Ford laughed in spite of himself.

The other two cars were similarly terrible. The second one, painted a suspect green, was filled with birds upon birds upon birds. Half of them were obviously pigeons painted to be other birds, the rest a collection of haggard birds of exotic nationalities that were surely the result of illegal animal smuggling. One of them was a charbroiled chicken carcass in a glass case that claimed to be the remains of a phoenix, a notion Ford spent a good long while ranting about as Stan came up with increasingly absurd ways for it to be a real phoenix corpse despite the fake nature of everything else.

The yellow-coated third car was the best in that it fully descended into the realm of absurdity. Animals had been butchered into pieces and sown back together into complete mishmashes of chimeras that strained the imagination and one’s sense of good taste. There was a wolf with hawk wings, a squirrel with a scorpion’s tail, a snake with what looked disturbingly like human teeth.

“I can’t believe this place hasn’t been shut down,” Ford said, wishing he could study those teeth in more detail. Were they human?

Unfortunately, even he had enough awareness to know you couldn’t go asking to please have the taxidermy snake in an exhibit to test its teeth. That might invite questions like, ‘how are you going to test if they’re human?’ 

“Shit, I can,” Stan said, examining a set of mice with insect wings stapled to their backs on a small table. “Pigs suck at their jobs, what do they care about some weirdo making monsters in the woods?”

“I suppose.”

It took them another twenty minutes of making fun of the stitching and poor attempts at musculature before they wandered back out, having thoroughly enjoyed themselves. They passed the teenage employee as they went, who made no attempt to hide the joint she was smoking. Ford suspected Stan was right on the money; no local authorities of any kind cared about this place.

Back in the car, Stan paused a moment in starting the car, pulling something out of his coat pockets. Ford let out a shout of surprise as Stan dumped a handful of the taxidermy fairy mice into his lap.

“Be quiet or she’s gonna get on our asses,” Stan said. “Anyway, here’s some mementos. Don’t thank me too hard, now.”

The grin on his face could only be described as shit-eating. 

Ford burst into peals of laughter, trying not to let the mice fall into the foot-space of the passenger seat without actually touching them with his bare hands. “Stanley, I can’t believe you. These things are going to give me rabies.”

Stan snorted. “Y’can’t get rabies like that.” Doubt flickered on his face. “Can you?”

“No,” Ford admitted, unwilling to be wrong even for the bit. “But if anything could manage it, it’d be these awful things.”

The mice peered up at him with glassy, beady eyes. They seemed to beg for death despite being dead.

“You love ‘em. They’re exactly your type’a shit,” Stan said.

“They are not!”

Stanley started the car and peeled out of the parking lot before Ford could even think of returning the horrible mice to their resting place. He laughed at all of Ford’s furious spluttering, not in the least bit afraid or concerned about Ford’s ire.

And maybe there was a reason Ford relented so easily. He already knew where to put the awful things in his cabin.

-----------------------------

Adjusting to being in Ford’s house was… odd.

Part of it was that when Stan ever managed to picture where Ford was living, it was usually off in the city, doing important science stuff in important science places. Somewhere big and blocky and white, science-y and all. He had known that Ford was here from calls from his mom, but the reality never really settled in his mind as the truth.

The big cabin in woods a drive out from a small lumber town was not that. It didn’t fit the eager seventeen year old Stan remembered, so ready to be part of something huge and bustling. Something more than the slow, boring crawl of a tiny beach town.

But then, he couldn’t have imagined that twiggy version of his brother getting the shoulders and arms to successfully tackle him to the ground or the speed to sprint after him without getting winded. Couldn’t have imagined that Ford gleefully stealing a car.

He couldn’t have imagined that version of Ford looking so crushed at the thought of him being dead, either, so maybe it was a good thing he found Ford had changed from what he was. Besides, he was still completely Ford in all the ways that mattered, in the madcap enthusiasm and the grammarian ways and the rambling and the tapping of his fingers, which eased the sting of finding his twin had changed in his absence. 

Actually being in the house also helped. It looked like a movie prop department for every mad scientist thriller ever made had exploded in the place, aka exactly what Stan would’ve imagined for Ford. After chasing the gnomes—the gnomes, what the fuck —out of the cabin and falling asleep on the floor for the first night, Ford had vaguely apologized for not cleaning up and then immediately got distracted trying to arrange jars filled with something on some shelving.

Stan wasn’t allowed to help on account of Ford having a specific organizational method in mind, which Stan had never been able to parse even after seventeen years of living with the guy. Mostly he ended up prodding at the anatomical skeleton Ford had in the house for some reason. Weren’t these things real bones? 

It was here in this house that both was and wasn’t everything Stan imagined for Ford that a lot of things Stan had tried to avoid thinking about swam to the forefront.

“How many times did we repeat the week?” Stan found himself asking.

Ford stopped in place, staring off into the distance. It was the sort of concentrated look that Stan vaguely remembered, one that meant Ford was doing a lot of math in his head. Or that he felt nauseous and was trying not to upchuck onto his own shoes. It was a toss-up when they were kids; Ford’s stomach had been pretty weak.

“I believe it was at least several months worth,” he said. “Maybe even close to half a year.”

“No,” Stan said, on principle. It couldn’t have been half a year.

“There are only fifty-two weeks in a year. You found a lot of ways to kill yourself.”

There was a momentary silence. Stan regretted bringing it up; they’d been doing pretty damn good at leaving the fact that Stan had wanted to kill himself pretty badly to the one conversation in the Stanleymobile. He guessed that was on him for thinking he could get away with never talking about it again.

Abruptly, Ford said, “Ma was the one to tell me.”

“Oh, shit,” Stan said. “I thought you were lying about Ma calling you about me.”

Ford frowned. “Well, I was—she never called me to warn me you were suicidal, she called to tell me you were dead.”

“Shit,” Stan said again, with great feeling.

The look Ford gave him was half-way between confused and incredulous, and he supposed he deserved it. Ford had mentioned that before, hadn't he? That Stan's deaths kept getting to him in the end.

It wouldn’t be right to say Stan hadn’t thought his family would learn about his death; he had, especially in the beginning. He’d gone for a drifter’s death out where no one could find him until identification would be a waste.

At some point, though, that aspect had just… faded away. The impact of what he was doing didn’t feel real. It didn’t matter that he was dying, that others were learn that he had died. Hell, a couple times he’d gone for deaths that would make a scene, would maybe end up on the news if the news cycle had ever been allowed to get past Friday. Those would’ve certainly made it back to the rest of the Pines.

Stan had forgotten the fact that by leaving a body to be identified, his mom would learn that he had died. How he had died. That she’d have to ring up Ford and probably Shermie too to break the news.

He wanted to ask what their mom had sounded like relaying his death. He didn’t actually want to know.

Too bad, Ford was already speaking again. “It was her every time. Well, every time there was a phone call to receive; sometimes I’d go the whole week without one and I always wondered… oh, and our dad called once.”

“Pa?” Stan repeated. “Pa called?”

If what his mom had sounded like was something Stan didn’t want to imagine, what his dad had sounded like was something he couldn’t imagine. The concept of his father taking the time to call Ford and give the news just didn’t make sense.

Ford’s jaw tightened and he rearranged a few jars with unnecessary force. “Yes. It was when you—when you were murdered.”

“By old Gas Bag?”

His twin let out a sharp laugh, looking quite surprised at having done so. “Gas Bag?”

“He had a stupid last name!” Stanley said, gesturing defensively. “And he was a gas bag. Full of hot air.”

The fledgling smile on Ford’s face faded as he continued to survey his shelves. “Yes, the first time with him, I believe. Pa called, as he had been the one to confirm who you were. He usually was.”

Stanley didn’t know how to feel about that little tidbit. Wincingly, his mind flipped through some of his deaths like a receptionist flipping through her rolodex of phone numbers. Shot himself in the head, in the mouth, jumped, poisoned himself with cleaning supplies, lit himself on fire…

Very few of them ever left his body looking very…palatable. And while Stan’s relationship and opinion of his dad could be described as ‘complicated’ on the best of days, he wasn’t sure he wanted the old man to have to see him like that. 

He stared at the anatomical skeleton some more. At least it ke[t Ma from seeing what was left of him. That was something.

Ford broke him out of his morbid reverie. “I’m going to punch him the next time I see him.”

“Who, Gas Bag?” Stan said, baffled. He was pretty sure they’d never meet again.

“No, Pa,” Ford said. “When he called, he—he had the gall to blame you for it, you know. That you were dead, that you were living the kind of life where someone might murder you. I remembered thinking for a second that he might regret it, you know, that he’d understand what he’d done, by the way he was acting—but it was your fault. Of course. It had to be your fault, not his. Not even your dead body could shake him of that.”

Ford’s voice was filled with a cold venom Stan had never heard before. 

He tried to muster up much of a reaction to what Ford actually said, but he found himself oddly distant to it. Of course Pa made it all his fault again. That was an old pattern Stan had taken way too long to notice.

Maybe his dad did regret it. Maybe he didn’t. That version of his dad was as dead as Stan tried to make himself. He never really existed.

“Sounds like Pa,” Stan muttered, flicking the arm of the skeleton and watching it swing in response. 

Ford’s expression contorted. He marched away, and left Stan wondering what was happening. His brother returned with several things: the mice Stan had purloined for him in a plastic bag they had mustered up at some point, a stack of post-it notes, and a marker. Ford wrote “CURSE PA NEXT OPPORTUNITY” and stuck it right on the doorframe to the storage room. Then he set about aggressively arranging the fairy-mice in the space on his shelves.

Stan did not find the post-it note weirdly heart-warming. He didn’t.

-----------------------------

Stan woke up with a start. For a long second, he didn’t recognize the ceiling above him, and his heart seized in his chest—where was the water-damage pattern of the motel room he spent months getting used to? 

The fact that it was dark wood above him threw him even more. Most places he ended up in while sleeping didn’t involve homey cabin interiors. More bare concrete and plaster and maybe some dried blood or vomit no one bothered to clean up.

His gaze swung around the room. Then he really almost had a heart-attack, because Moses, there was someone standing in the frame of the doorway, the light shining behind them blocking out all detail until they were a shadowy silhouette. 

Stanley nearly got his hands on the lamp on the bedside table before his brain caught up to everything and his eyes adjusted to the light to make out the other person’s face. The motel, yes, the loops and the many deaths of Stanley Pines, and then, suddenly and miraculously, his last death and Ford dragging him back to his house in Backwater, Oregon.

It was just Ford. Just Ford, standing in his— his! That was novel—bedroom’s doorway in the perfect way to look like he was about to murder the hell out of Stan. Classic Sixer. His knack for menacing would be applaudable if he could actually do it on purpose.

As Ford stood there in the dark like a creep, he looked steadily at Stan and said: “Stanley, I want you to know that if you ever change your mind and actually manage to kill yourself, I’m going to kill myself right after. Just so you’re aware.”

A hysterical bark of laughter burst out of Stan before he could help it. Whatever he’d expected Ford to say, it wasn’t that. The laughter was swiftly followed by a, “Stanford, holy shit.”

“I’m being completely sincere,” Ford clarified. “Ideally, I’d just resurrect you somehow, but if that doesn’t work I’m coming after you.”

The worst thing was that Stan believed him without a doubt. Man, they were fucked up.

“Fuck’s sake, Pollux,” he infused the nickname with as much sarcasm as he could manage, “I’m not killing myself. Not today, not tomorrow, not in the next eighty years. Please get out of my room.”

Ford sighed like Stan was being the weird one here. But he did leave, departing with an unnecessary flourish of the bathrobe he was wearing for some reason. 

“I would do it!” Ford called one more time as he shut the door.

Stan sighed and looked up at the dark wood of the ceiling, the house creaking slightly with Ford’s movements back to his own room.. 

He was the happiest he’d ever been in his life.

[sevsbestfriend]

I usually write fics here but I just wanna rant rn.

Sometimes I got to old posts and stuff, either to get new ideas or just see what the fuck is going on with the other side of the fandom.

The people coming to James defense or crazy, like on one hand they are like 'oh he was only human, he grew as a person otherwise how would lily love him?'

We literally have cannon confirmation that the fucking prat didn't stop hexing people, he just learned to hide it better. Sirius and Remus confirmed this when they called Severus a 'special case'. I don't give a shit about them saying he attacked first, you better believe I am attacking first if I come across a guy who has stripped me naked in public when I didn't do shit to him. (Or the other guy who tried to get me killed by bloody werewolf) Like wtf are you even talking about at that point???

Also, Harry comes across a detention report of them hexing another student in their 7th year. So uhm...yeah.

Then they are like 'oh Severus hates him so his memories are biased'

Did you morons even read the books?? Pensive memories are unbiased, any manipulation is extremely apparent as we saw in Slughorns case. So NO they aren't biased that extremely uncomfortable read of SWM? it's fucking canon in its truest sense.

Also, how in the ever living hippogryph does a guy who strips people naked for fun change so much that he becomes head boy??

It's pretty simple, he doesn't. He learns to hide it better and given the fact that this person has always been given the benefit of the doubt, it is very easy for them to their nature.

Dude had a map that showed him everyone's real time location and an invisibility cloak, he could damn well harass anyone in isolated corners of the castle if he wished. Which is exactly what he did.

Also, these people love to claim how 'lily only approved of him cause he changed.'

To that I say, Who the fuck is Lily?? Mother Teresa??

How is she the ultimate decider of what is good and bad and at the same time, completely right in dating someone who stripped another student makes after a year (or 2) of the event??

Don't get me wrong, she doesn't owe Severus anything, really, but seriously this is just ridiculous. Like if I was a woman, I would be genuinely terrified of someone like that, especially when they got away with no real consequences what so ever.

James was a prick with a very good PR team for friends and teachers. That's really it, it is often said that good looking people can get away with a lot of things and James is just a prime example of that.

---_---_---_---_---_---_---_---_

Also...BRAVE?? Dude had 2 cheat items and the advantage of a Pureblood upbringing and was still too PUSSY to face Severus alone. Yeah..what a real Gryphindor that one. Scrams bravery to you doesn't it? He did this all the way till 17, so yeah he definitely was super important in the order right??

---_---_---_---_---_---_---_---_---_

Dumbledore invested quite a bit in the Marauders with his blatant favoritism and letting a werewolf in the school risking his own position as a headmaster.

And...they all turned to be bloody useless. With only James being useful because of his participation in the birth of Harry Potter.

Sirius in his madness derailed a murder investigation for a fucking decade.

Remus, I genuinely can't remember anything substantial Remus did, except for letting someone he believed was a murderer into Hogwarts and never telling Dumbledore that they were Animagus to begin with.

---_---_--_---_

Seriously, the most useful person in the war had to literally beg on his knees for the man to use him. Even fate was like, for fucks sake, just give this guy a chance already.

[f-imaginings]

I took a break from writing billford to colour in my billford comic that was just sitting in my drafts lmao. The grind never stops.

This is based on the gender swapped college au that has been rotating in my head for years. Here's the last comic I did for it, so folks can see the vibe I was going for.

Basically if we did a gender swap to achieve peak toxic yuri, I can't see older woman Stanford falling for Bill's tricks but if she were younger and more insecure, say at college, it could be an excellent setting for manipulation, since Ford might still crave social acceptance while acting like she doesn't need it. Major 'I'm not like other girls' vibes from young girl Ford.

Then if you throw in cultish sorority nonsense it would shape up to be a pretty interesting AU. Think Mona Awad's Bunny meets Gravity Falls.

Other fun facts about this au (that I may have a few pages of a fanfic already started in my drafts for haha) are as follows:

Bill is a second year transfer student who somehow within the span of days rose to power as Tri-Delta's sorority leader!

They introduce themselves to everyone as Bill Cipher, but because its the 70s and they're a girl all the other pledges call her Billie to feminize it a bit.

Bill offers to be Ford's first friend, but Ford rejects her on principle as she finds sororities to be vapid popularity contests and assumes Billie is no better. Ford's actual first friend is Viola McGucket who was named after the fancy word for her Pa's fiddle.

Occult phenomena has begun increasing ever since Billie usurped Tri-Delta's old leader and pledging rituals have involved dark magic, summonings and mysteries galore (a bit like the campus in Carmilla) which Stanford is keen to investigate.

Stanford has to prove to her father that she can be successful as a woman in STEM and is looking for something that will put her on the map as a scientist and change the world. Her idol switches from Tesla to Marie Curie.

She seeks comfort in the occult and thinks that her weird features and her intellect make her better than other girls (residual internal misogyny from Filbrick) but she learns solidarity when she has to save the sorority pledges and the rest of the world from Bill's machinations when she realises what the portal is for.

She is very gay, but acts like all women in STEM have to embody more masculine qualities, which is how she denies how gay her thoughts are all the time lmao.

She only starts stalking/obsessing over Billie after peeking at her essays to see that Billie is scoring higher than she is and is a certified genius.

She falls in love with Billie though once she realises that she's not human, and desperately seeks the acceptance in the occult she always envisioned. Bill makes her feel special too, often confirming Ford's biases against the pledges bc Bill thinks the sorority girls are braindead pawns.

Stanley didn't get kicked out, however she left home to make it big on her own while Stanford went to college. Right now she is dabbling in multi-level marketing schemes like Avon and tupperware parties, wanting to prove to her dad on the other side of the spectrum that a woman can make it big in business.

bonus Billie for the folks who read this long haha.

[exilethegame]

What's the go-to topic for the RO's if you want to get them talking for the next 4 hours straight? In other words, what kind of things are they most interested in/passionate about?

Hmm...

Vethna: Politics in Vygrand, the ethics of blood magic, the history of magic in general... they are very much an academic at heart and like trying to find the balance between a "perfect world" and reality. Plus they've never spoken about these things to someone who takes them seriously, so having a place to do just that would have Vethna blabbering for hours.

Nikke: Weapons, daggers, specifically. He collects them as he finds them which may be grim to other people (considering he usually takes them from the bodies of the people he kills), but hey... it's still a cool collection, okay? He also loves talking about all his adventures and sharing stupid stories about cool places he's visited. Also fighting techniques. He's genuinely super into that. Goes for Jost + Nikke that they both have A LOT to say about the Taipan gang in Vrithka as well. Like a lot a lot. (None of them are good things)

Jost: Jost is a listener, not a talker. But in the rare, rare occasion you have her going on about something, it's usually because she's upset and somehow, you became the one person she trusts enough to vent things to. It's not necessarily upset as in sad, per se, but she's in a place emotionally where needs someone to bounce ideas and thoughts off of. (However, passion-wise, she's super into the arts, so you could probably pull some words out from her re. arts from the Old Worlds, museums, that sort of thing). 

Amilia: Amilia does not stop talking. Amilia will go for hours talking about a cute mushroom on the side of the road, no not underestimate her. And you know what? Yes, she's doing it to annoy who she's with, but part of her really is interested in that mushroom you know. On a more serious note, she's really into music and getting to know people. Amilia's one of those people that makes others open up pretty easily, and it's something she genuinely enjoys since she likes learning the "lore" of individuals. (... is that just gossip?)

Sabir: Astrology, the gods of the Old World, the Old World in general, really. Interestingly enough, Sabir does not enjoy talking about politics. Like you can rile him up if you try hard and enough, but he sincerely tries to avoid getting too far into it because it's such a glib subject. That, and he's already talking about politics all day given his position. Sabir isn't a ramble talker though-- he won't just chatter for hours on end about something. He's into the art of conversation, you see. The back-and-forth is what's fun for him, so he'd rather talk about nothing at all and fill the conversation with shallow banter than passionately talk about his map collection.

Syfyn: Just remind her of the time someone vaguely pissed her off one time and you got about an hour of entertainment off that incident alone. (One time a person cut her in line at the mess hall, one time she stubbed her toe because someone moved a box, one time--) Syfyn also likes talking about combat and training, but Nikke's more like "genuine excitement and tips and tricks" and Syfyn's more like "lmfao I kicked your ASS you're a loser" or "did you see how hard I punched that thing lemme remind you"

Freedom: Hmm... this only works if one is super-super close with Freedom, but they'll be very genuine and skip the word-games when it comes to talking about the Old World, the time when the other gods were alive, their past and people they've met/known. That's the one thing Freedom could speak about for hours and be upfront about AND be genuinely invested in the conversation. They enjoy sharing relics of history with people who are actually willing to listen, and the fact anyone might want to really know about them on an individual level would be very flattering.

[demonicintegrity]

“America is back!” I still don’t understand what that’s suppose to mean— why are they changing USA again. Is that normal? Or just a trump thing?

“Golden age of America” no it’s not

Elon Musk why are you HERE?

“Our spirit is back, our confidence is back” bestie you just made a fool of us on the national stage.

“And perhaps never witness again.” I sure do hope this doesn’t happen ever again. (Copium)

“We won the popular vote by big numbers” oooo I hear boos. And they’re getting drowned out by the USA chants.

“For a map that reads almost completely red” bestie corn can’t vote.

“More Americans believe we’re heading in the right direction.” Weren’t the polls just showing him drop in popularity??

Oh damn. I didn’t see what was happening too much but someone won’t sit down. DO NOT CLAP ABOUT DIRECTING THE SERGEANT??

“Mr. Green take your seat.” - speaker of the house.

What is he saying I can’t even hear it— oh shit. He is going to be removed. What did he say? I saw him standing up and saying smth but it didn’t catch in the mic.

I see a couple “save Medicaid” signs.

“Most successful in the series of our nation.” I don’t believe that one bit. But I know we’re not gonna find a source on it— NUMBER TWO IS GEORGE WASHINGTON??? WHO IS SAYING THAT??

“Joe Biden— the worst president—“ isnt Nixon and Reagan there—

Mental asylums??? They’re coming from mental asylums???

Well. He’s right. He won’t be able to make dems happy. Lmao

OOO “musk steals” signs.

“Why not join us in celebrating many wins for America” I heard laughter. We are not winning.

A freeze on hiring and regulations is not going to help the economy— it will make it worse. And we shouldn’t have stopped aid—

STOP BRAGGING ABOUT REMOVING US FROM WHO AND THE PARIS AGREEMENT??

You think the UN Human Rights assembly was un-American??? Hello??? What??????

“For every one new regulation, we must end ten old regulations.” Those are written in the blood. Like those regulations are in place because people died. That’s not something to brag about.

Oh the signs switched to false. So that’s what the dems are doing. Neat I guess.

English is the official language. I. Don’t know what that is suppose to change.

WHY ARE YOU CHEERING ABOUT THE RENAMINGS???

DEI is not tyranny. You would think he knows all about that. What the fuck.

“Woke no longer.” Define woke for me. Do it.

Critical race theory as poison. Shut up.

The stupid two genders mandate. Fuck that noise.

And banning trans women from sports.

It seems like this is just rehash of—

“Invaded by a male—“ wait is this the girl who got socked in the face by a volleyball. Something that happens regularly? But it was made a big deal this cherry picked time? Hm.

“It’s demeaning for women.” I miss when we were talking about how sports needed to be degendered bc there was no actual need for it. If it needed to be divided it would by weight class or smth.

That. Was your economy idiot. He inherited your economy.

“Eggs get out of control!” Shut UUUUPPPPP.

Oh hey a couple shirts saying resist just walked out. Neat I guess.

“Drill baby drill”

Wait. National gas pipeline in Alaska? Apparently a huge one that doesn’t sound good for the environment—

“And rare earths here in the USA.” What are rare earths hello???

“Perhaps you heard of it.” Oh piss right off.

“Which is headed by Elon Musk, which is in the gallery tonight.” Oh so he’s saying that part out loud. How fun.

“He didn’t need this.” What the fuck does that mean.

No the dems don’t appreciate it.

Wow. Him talking about the cuts makes me get pretty depressed actually. MAKING MICE TRANSGENDER??? NO WAY. No way male circumcision is there. What the fuck.

The laughter from republicans is so sickening actually. It’s sickening. It’s so sickening. There’s no humanity when you take joy in the fact that these services are taken away from people who were relying on them.

(Cutting here bc this is going to be a long post)

Who else is shouting?

It’s worth noting that these numbers are saying are likely a percentage point of the budget. They’re just big numbers and that’s what they’re counting on you getting hung up on.

“False!!” At least now they’re saying it out loud.

Where are these numbers being pulled from?? I don’t believe it one bit.

“More money in the pockets of American families.” You mean right folk?

“The interest rates took a big drop, a big beautiful drop.”

I mean. Sure. You can try to balance the budget but something tells me you won’t.

Gold card. Five million dollars. Buy your way in. Buy your way in. What happened to merit lmao.

Wwwhhhyyyy do you care about people coming in to work. There’s nothing wrong from work from home—

Wdym removed immediately—

THE LAUGHTER AT THE UNELECTED BUREAUCRATS LINE

Yeah. Those tax cuts. I’m suuurreee theyre for the average person and not the rich. Sure.

“start by paying your taxes.” LMAO.

Yknow what would also help the average American? Raising the minimum wage. Making tipped jobs up to minimum wage.

“As one of the most important [dates] in history.” Yeah. Sure will. /neg

“I’m a very superstitious person” uh huh

I love the idea of being made we’re not allowed in foreign markets in the same breath of wanting more things made in America.

“Nobody’s ever seen anything like it.” The opium crisis. Quite literally still feeling the effects of that.

Oh god it’s been an hour. I have homework to do before midnight whoops.

All these plans to build investments in the USA— what?? Is he talking about now? Chip act? He lost me a little maybe I zoned out or maybe I’m stupid I don’t know.

Bare with him. Okay.

“Our farmers are gonna have a field day” I kinda doubt it. With the bird flu. And govt agencies unable to communicate. And no workers and workers protections. Etc.

And shouting out this steel worker— over forty foster children. Okay that is actually quite impressive and respectable with firefighting as well.

Melania is getting a shout out for foster care??? Huh. Never heard of these programs.

The criminalization of deepfakes is good. Didn’t hear about that before this.

Oh don’t use that as a Segway to the border and protecting children. Wasn’t Biden’s border policies not even that different from Trumps?

Oh he’s bringing up the woman who was murdered by an immigrant. That was—

Savage???? Savage?? That’s racially charged. Oh lord.

And I will say, that death is tragic. But politicalizing this feels icky. Her mother said thank you. But something feels just, off color about this.

I mean. No one cared when Nex, a trans student died by bullies. That wouldn’t ever get an invitation from the president now would it?

They don’t want her to die in vain. Which can be a noble intent. I just don’t trust that with trump yknow? Obvs I want justice for that family. But this doesn’t feel quite right.

“But it turns out all we needed was a new president.” Why are you chanting trump.

Oh lord he’s talking about towns over run by immigrants— LIBERATION FROM WHO?????

Oh what happened to that daughter is horrific. That is awful. Making an animal refugee for her is sweet— GULF OF AMERICA ruined it. But. That is a sweet gesture. It’s hard to be upset at that. That is sweet.

SAVAGES?? STOP CALLING THEM SAVAGES???? That’s so racially charged holy shit.

As terrorist organizations. We can’t even say the KKK and nazis are bad without debate but we can focus on that. Okay.

“Rio grand” it’s Rio grande. Preeetttyyy sure it’s grande.

Wage war on the cartels. Which likely means bomb and get civilians in the crossfire. Could you imagine if Mexico declared the KKK a terrorist organization and said they’re gonna wage war? There would be such a fit about the crossfire. And how it was unfair to wage war against America for a fringe group that doesn’t represent us. Which. They actually might.

“Bring back law and order to our cities and towns.” Ironic. Coming from you. He’s acting like a victim as if he wasn’t just feeling the consequences of his actions.

“Voted for me in record numbers.” Shut uuuuup.

Question bc this is my first joint session: is it normal to have these many people who suffered tragedies to these things? This feels like a lot—

MANDATORY DEATH PENALTY FOR ANYONE KILLING A COP??? Oh hell no.

Oh there’s shouting—

That is a thirteen year old. Okay. What an off time to pull him into the spotlight— oh he overcame brain cancer. Good for him. That’s amazing for him. He’s been signed in— AN AGENT OF SECRET SERVICE?? Okay poor kid looks a little overwhelmed. Oh he has a badge now. Cute???

I was thirteen when trump took office. I was

…. JFK Jr is not going to make America healthy again.

Toxins out of our environment yet pulled from the Paris agreement???

Why are you bringing up autism rates. Uhm. What do you mean what is going on.

Toxic ideologies— what do you mean secretly encourage her kid— they them pronouns— THATS NOT CHILD ABUSE. Oh my god. Is this kid okay. Is this trans kid okay? I was thirteen when I questioned my gender is this kid okay. Genuinely. Is this kid still here and okay?

Yknow when he talks about ending child sex changes there are exceptions for intersex babies right? Because they don’t conform. Unnecessary surgery. Purely cosmetic and even harmful.

Hour and half mark. I don’t feel good.

I’m still thinking about that kid whos transphobic parents are there. If that kid didn’t feel safe enough to come out to their parents, imagine their feelings to their parents finding out and then weaponizing that politically oh my god. Is that kid okay?

What a way to get a westpoint acceptance. Damn.

“This is a very dangerous world.” Yeah no shit.

WHY DO WE NEED TO RECLAIM THE PANAMA CANEL!? What do you mean a large American company bought ports on both sides— wait wdym we didn’t give it to china?? What does china have to do with this???

What. Message to Greenland.

“And if you choose—” they never chose to join us??? They never— important for military security. Oh that’s why. They want to make more military bases.

The pan over to some democrats looking like they’re taking deep breaths through this speech which. Fair enough.

PUTIN? YOURE BRINGING UP PUTIN NOW???

Do you mean the peace agreements Israel has broken often?

“Rough neighborhood.” ………….

“No end in sight.” Yeah I wonder why. I wonder who has contributed to that instability Mr trump and musk—

Calling Elizabeth Warren Pocahontas? Wow what a tool.

I remember reading the EU disputing the idea they haven’t spent as much as America.

Oh a mother and son reunited. That is sweet. Good for them. I do wonder though, why exactly is he taking credit for this?

Talking about the assassination attempt. It is tragic that people in the crowd were shot as well. That father who took the bullet for his wife and kids should be recognized. I know some people won’t have sympathy for trump supports but I can’t bring myself to be mean and disrespectful to those hurt in that.

“I was saved by god to make America great again.” Eeeuuuuggghhh don’t like that sound of that.

This is probably the conclusion? And like, from a speech standpoint it’s actually not bad. Better than I expected. But the fact that it’s being said from Trump— okay lmao vanquish communist that ruins it but tracks for American politicians— anyways the fact that it’s coming from trump feels sooo disingenuous.

“Forge the freeist—“ no. No you’re not.

“Highest quality of life” by cutting Medicare and SNAP???

The flag on mars??????? Why????

And the chanting again— and the golden age again Ough.

That’s the end of it. A two hour speech. I don’t feel good that’s for sure. But I gotta process this later.

[ronqueesha]

More fun 40k facts that want to spill out of my brain for my mutuals:

There's a post going around that shows Rogue Trader has an ingame calendar similar to other Owlcat games. And it's pretty good too! Contrary to how the game portrays warp jumps as instant teleports between star systems, actual jumps into the warp are done in real time. The FTL system is just for punching a hole in reality so the ship can enter literal hell.

Warp journeys in 40k can last for weeks, months, even years. This is one reason why the average person in the 40k universe doesn't travel through space. Space Marines frequently travel across the galaxy, but they live for centuries and can travel through the warp without dying of old age before reaching their destination.

Even then, with how weird time works in the warp, there have been accounts of ships arriving at their destination before they even left. Orks have killed their own duplicates when this happens to get another copy of their favorite weapon.

IRL and in 40k, Earth is pretty far from the center of the galaxy, in a pretty backwater interstellar neighborhood. That has not stopped the Imperium from literally redrawing the map of the galaxy to put Holy Terra in the middle, and shifting the rest of the galaxy and its sectors around it.

Only the wealthiest, most elite and best educated people in the Imperium know of Holy Terra's history before the age of the Imperium. They know of legendary cities like Atlantys and Nova Yoruk. As well as nation-states called Jermani and Hy Brasil. (brazil mentioned for the Brazilian mutuals, it's part of canon too!)

[wheeboo]

seventeen as games they would play on roblox

FEATURING. seventeen (ot13) GENRE. headcanons, crack WORD COUNT. 552 

notes: this is purely just for shits and giggles. ty @haecien for sparking the idea on discord and @yeonjuns-redhair for helping me LMAO. i was such a roblox nerd back then pls don't question me thank u. this game traumatized me fr.

scoups - mm2/arsenal/phantom forces: bro would be such a try hard whenever he becomes murderer or sheriff in mm2. he would also own like all the damn legendary knives, guns, knife effects, prob has hella robux and connections to get all those, might also play obnoxious audios on his radio to assert dominance. arsenal and phantom forces is self-explainable since he's pretty good at fps games

jeonghan - brookhaven/free admin games: is definitely trolling and scaring people on brookhaven or any roleplay game lmfao. would pretend to be their child just for him to turn his avatar into the most terrifying monster ever and make people rage quit. he'd easily take over those games that grant free admin, literally everyone would be under his fingers

joshua - royale high: shua was hard since he doesn't rlly play video games? he would def not be into these competitive games. i can see him having fun dressing up his avatar in royale high for some reason. would prob lowkey be an annoying troll, or those rich ass mfs constantly showing off

jun - adopt me: self-explanatory. the top of his bucket list is to adopt all pets possible in the game. might even find ways to scam people out of their stuff (my cousin does this, don't be like her).

hoshi - jailbreak: he likes chaotic games. he brings chaos to the server. tries to also bribe woozi into playing with him so they can both be the Richest Lads in the server. either that or he absolutely sucks at playing the game and keeps getting arrested by the police.

wonwoo - tower of hell/dungeon quest/arsenal/doors: can't really decide on one. he's pretty versatile with his games but i think he mainly prefers battle strategy games and fighting games. would definitely complete a tower of hell obby in less than a minute fr. is probably on the leaderboard of dungeon quest and has all the legendary spells, armour, and weapons. he's also completely fine with anything horror

woozi - those anime sims n fighting games/death ball/robeats: personally i have never played any of those anime fighting games ever but he would def be the one to enjoy them the most. will def beat your ass in death ball with his gigantic double wielded swords. he'd also continuously get hella high scores on robeats

dk - work at a pizza place: no explanation needed. he is living his life as a cook and delivery person

mingyu - theme park tycoon/natural disaster survival: i found mingyu to be hard as well LMAO. i feel like he could make a bomb ass theme park in theme park tycoon tho. either that or he's getting freaked out over the blocky tsunami coming his way

minghao - bloxburg/royale high/those fashion games: ahh he's living his life designing his perfect dream home and definitely has all the gamepasses. has the best fashion in royale high. would definitely spend his robux to get VIP so he can get access to the Better clothes in those fashion games (fun fact: i'm banned on bloxburg cuz i'm just too damn good 😔)

seungkwan - pls donate/works in a group: has the prettiest booth in pls donate so he can get robux but is constantly arguing with the nine year olds who are begging for him to donate to them. might also be an MR/HR/SR at a group (don't work at roblox groups guys, i beg of you)

vernon - bee swam simulator: no thoughts, just vernon playing bee swarm simulator being the best thing ever

dino - speed run: constantly frustrated over each time he falls off the map. he never makes it to the end

taglist (open) ʚɞ @enhazen @haowrld @icyminghao @slytherinshua @jeonride @lockburn-castle @vrnism @weird-bookworm @mhlsymlysn @ryuwonieebae @yeonjuns-redhair @wonwooz1 @woohaeyo @mark-geolli @caramyisabitchforsvtandbts @aaniag @wootify @carlesscat-thinklogic23 @phenomenalgirl9

[cultofthelambdoodles]

Hi y'all! Lamb here! So, I wanted to show y'all a bit around!

So, these are the Lands of the Old Faith!

Ok so there's a lot to talk about.

First is Darkwood, right!

Not much to say about Darkwood, but its quite nice! If I had to pick where to live, this would be it. The climate is nice. Aaaand I'm getting out of track.

So Leshy's temple is around the center right there, then at the edge of the Branch Peninsula sits the Pilgrim's Passage! Which due to the many rocks and islands surrounding it is usually filled with shipwrecks.

Fun fact! There's only one way to get in or out of thr lands. By the Pilgrim's Entry. Any and all boats coming or leaving must stop there to do a full cargo inspection and visa check.

The passage and entry sit on the Split Ocean. My mother told me stories about a lot of the land, and this was one of them. Apparently, the first god split the lands from the world with an axe, and created this ocean. Cool, right? She also says that deep in the horizon resides his body, impaled by the bishops.

Ok ok next is Anura!

Here was Heket who was pretty hard to understand when she spoke. Ok so!

Dead center is her temple.

Now, over west is Spore Grotto! Here lives a friend called Sozo! He's an ant that just LOVES menticide mushrooms! Now, usually I brought him some once a year for decades but last year he told me to leave him alone for a bit. Weird but hey, his deal, not mine.

Then there's Midas's cave whichI HATE!I won't talk about it, just avoid Midas, he's a douchebag who just wants to steal your gold!

Now, south there's The Frog's Neck, a teeny tiny passage where not much happens, and off shore is... lemme check the name.., RAKSHASHA'S PLACE! Dear Narinder what a name. Anyways the dude makes GREAT food!

And off east there's a giant pumpkin patch but nobody cares.

Up north is Anchordeep! I really like the place, when I mapped it out, it had the shape of a squid!

This is Kallamar's domain, his temple sits in the head gulf. Honestly. You'd think Anchordeep is a desolate no man's land, but when festival season hits its absolutely amazing! And don't start me on the food!

Off Anchordeep are The Depths. Basically, the borders of Anchordeep are a giant cliff that is so deep you can't see the bottom.

Then there's Silk Cradle, former domain of Shamura. They used to have their temple dead center too. Silk Cradle connects to the webbed sea, which has that name due to the amount of foam that forms in it. There's also that lonely island which people say a god resides in, but if there is, they're probably long dead from the bishops.

There's also the northern peaks!

I've heard that was the old domain of The Twin Gods, Brutus and Plight. However they say greed was their demise, and now what's left of them is their lifeless body and their temple, the prettiest in the land. Sad, but hey, bigger they are, stronger they fall.

And finally there's the Dead Savanna! This used to be Nari's domain (which, I see why he wanted more). I was brought to his old temple and now we have a cult there!

Now, it wasn't ALWAYS dead. It used to thrive with. Problem is, most were lambs and... yeah...

There's also some other spots like that place I labeled the start,which was the family farm! I grew up right there! Being between 3 kingdoms helped business a lot. And at the end, they executed me like 10 minutes from there... Quite poetic isn't it?

And then there's also a lot of uncharted territory down south-east, which is the continent the old faith supposedly split from. Might have to check some day.

Anyways, that's that. Lamb out! Gotta show Nari around! And his kits too IG.

[junocandraw]

Okay so fun fact I tried to type this out yesterday and it took me half an hour and I was SO proud and Tumblr glitched and I lost everything. So, we’re taking it from the top!

Infodumping about the timeline in my slenderverse AU:

So the diagram above is a map of how everything works. A long time ago in a realm right next to ours, there lived Slenderman and his family. Slenderman had a problem: He read lots of stories about humans growing up, and wanted desperately to prove that they were real. Monsters in this realm regarded humans the way we regard monsters; fictional beings who don’t really exist. So, he researches and does his homework and his brothers are all very concerned about him and how much he’s isolating himself from everyone. Finally, Slenderman figures out how to get to our world: the human realm.

*Insert clever science explanation here*

So after no-clipping into a new dimension, he finds that everything is purple. Purple trees, purple grass, almost like a filter. He comes across none other than…

HABIT!!!

So HABIT is really good at making pocket dimensions, and he teaches Slenderman that they are made by harnessing the energy of the ARK, and pulling the dimensions together, creating an overlap. The combination of the space, time, and matter makes a pocket dimension.

So Slenderman learns that HABIT sort of has an extra pocket dimension between the human realm and the monster realm, and he gives it to Slenderman as a…gift? How sweet! There is an old abandoned cabin, and an old mansion in this dimension but it probably won’t be very important… 👀

HABIT and Slenderman continuing being best buddies, but the. HABIT is like “HEY MAN, I HARNESSED THIS WHOLE DIMENSION JUMPING THING A WHILE BACK, DO YOU WANNA COME CHILL AT MY PLACE? FUN FACT IF YOU POKE JEFF KOVAL WITH ENOUGH KNIVES HE STOPS MOVING!”

Slenderman is line yeah sure man whatever. So, they go from HABIT’S pocket dimension to the EMH realm. This is where the iterations all take place. Now, Slenderman is kind of a control freak, and this is his first experience with real live humans, even though they’re in the EMH iterations. He starts to kind of take over, and HABIT isn’t having it, so they get into a fight and Slenderman gets kicked out. #toxicyaoi

So Slenderman goes back to his pocket dimension, and finds that another powerful monster has been going through dimensions and messing with humans through his gift-dimension thing. The tormentor is none other than LORD ZALGO!!

So obviously Slenderman is PISSED. He and Zalgo get into a fight (it’s hard to describe the fight because they’re both non-human entities and it wasn’t physical so) but Slenderman WINS which surprises EVERYONE including HABIT.

So it’s about 1990s at this point, and he and Zalgo had been taking turns looking at and having paranormal experiences with humans. Now that Slenderman has complete control of his own pocket dimension, and can visit the humans as he pleases, he’s pretty content. But, he needs help keeping Zalgo and his goons out of the human world.

So Slenderman tries to bring humans into the pocket dimension to help him, but they just die of the sigma radiation. (yes that is a canon term for all of my gen alphas out there) Slenderman realises that their blood has to go through a purification ritual, otherwise known as “Slender sickness”. When a human exhibits symptoms from Slenderman like nosebleeds, dizziness, mood swings, mania, fevers, etc, its their blood being made pure so that they can come and work in the woods for him.

Okay thats it. any questions?

[the-kr8tor]

Another potion request I think you may enjoy brewing up (Using my second and last slot).

A few stalks of baby's breath, mixed with epsom salt poured into a ❣️. Billie and Ramona could be from an orphanage that hitched a ride on the boat, the same fate as you...apart from the fact they just wanted some fun and weren't running away, and have adopted both BDAS!Hobie and you as parents. Signed by yours truly -🐦‍⬛

QISJJWIWJS BDAS + TWINS REQUEST?!!!! At your service 🫡

Pairing: Pirate! Hobie Brown x fem! Reader

Word count: 1.6 k

Tags: use of Y/N sparsely, no specific physical description of the reader, Billie and Ramona AU, dad! Hobie, mom! Reader, Pirate AU, BDAS AU, CW food mentions, FLUFF!

A/N: hmmm I think every BDAS enjoyer should read this

Between the Devil and the Sea Masterlist

Katy's one year celebration 🎉

The twins jump around in glee, running off to the side of the ship to watch the anchor fall down with a loud splash. They've been your pride and joy the moment they fell into your lap, literally, they fell off the sail and into your arms one sunny morning and you've since become their adopted mother from then on. Hell, you've got the bump on your head to prove it from how you tumbled just to catch Billie in your arms while Ramona who's nestled in the crook of your arm watches you with wide, curious eyes. Hobie saved the day though, if not for him you'd have more than a bump on your head. It's safe to say that the girls fell into your arms and Hobie's.

It's been two years since then, they've grown from little five year olds who refuses to leave yours and the captain's side; to a couple of seven year olds who cannot stand still for even a moment while they run around the ship looking to annoy someone. Usually it's Ned or James, but today, the little ones prefer to watch as the beloved ship anchors down near a lonesome island.

You pop in next to them, arm snaking around their shoulders, chin placed on top of Billie's curls that you've personally braided for today. You're still in awe at how much they look like Hobie now, so much so that you've questioned Hobie where he was seven years ago and if he had relations during that time. To which he always (lovingly) jabs you with his chin above your shoulder, whispering in your ear, saying that there was nobody else. And he definitely has never been in the town where Billie and Mona’s orphanage once resided. You believe him of course, but you never miss a chance to tease him about it.

Maybe they're starting to look like him because his love for the twins are so strong that it's starting to show on them. You like that idea better.

The entire crew loves them too, Finn always makes whatever they want to eat even if he just cleaned up for the night. Because of the girls, there's always an abundance of chocolate and sweets on board, to which you couldn't complain about. Yuri teaches them how to climb up the crow’s nest, which was a scare to you at first. You or Hobie always wait down at the deck with arms out just in case. Because of Ned, they're an expert at sewing, you once joked to Ned that they'll replace him one day. He sulked the entire day, you had to give him a peace offering of Finn's finest wine after that. And if suddenly the girls have gone missing, they're almost always by Miles, Pavitr, and Gwen, who are all happy to babysit them. To which Hobie always takes the opportunity to yank you into the captain's quarters to hoard you all to himself.

“Are you excited?” You mumble into Billie’s hair, hand rubbing softly at Mona's shoulder where Billie accidentally hit her with a toy wooden sword just yesterday.

“Mm-hmm!” Billie nods enthusiastically, while her sister stares at the lush island a few miles away.

“It's so pretty.” Mona whispers in awe. She turns her head towards you with a smile. “Do you really think the treasure's there?”

“Of course—”

“The map never lies, cheese.” Hobie pops up from nowhere, sliding up next to Mona's side, winking briefly at you, you chuckle softly, hand already reaching for him. Mona looks up at him with admiration, giving him a wide toothy smile while her sister does the same. “It's just like what Miles said, he pinpointed exactly where it is.”

“Uncle Miles is a genius!” Billie screeches, Hobie meets your hand halfway, immediately cupping your hand behind the girls' back.

“He’s brilliant!” Mona happily jumps in place when Finn starts to uncover the dinghy boat from the side of the ship.

Hobie mocks offense, “what ‘bout me and Y/N then? We're the one who got the map for you two.” He's right, sort of.

You and Hobie made the map yourselves for the anniversary of the day they fell into your arms. You both worked day and night to perfect it, making elaborate riddles that made the red sail pirates bend over backwards to sail all over the south end of the country to where you and your captain laid ‘traps’ and more riddles that would lead to the ‘treasure map’ of their dreams. The crew was on board the entire time, but you've never anticipated how fast the girls figured all the riddles out. It took them less than a week to find the map when you and Hobie thought it would take at least three weeks. Now the so-called treasure hunt is finished early, a few weeks off the anniversary.

“Oh, you and mum helped too, dad.” Mona grins at you and then to Hobie. You can never get used to the titles, your heart always sings whenever they call you ‘mum’ or more sweetly, ‘mummy’. Hobie shares the same testament, he feels like dancing whenever they call him ‘dad’ or ‘captain dad’.

Billie stares at Hobie, you can tell that she's up to something. “Nah, you were little help, dad. Mum at least got us satchels for the treasure.” You hide your laughter over Billie's head.

Hobie gasps, chuckles poking through the act. “‘Little help?’” the girls giggle at his reaction. “‘Little help?!’” The laughter gets louder as Hobie wildly throws his long arms about. “Whose bloody ship brought you to all the places, huh?” With a heave, he scoops them in his arms, lifting them and carrying them over his shoulders. You wish you could capture the moment as your little found family plays around your home.

“Mummy's!” They both exclaim, shrieking happily. Hobie fakes another offended gasp, blowing raspberries on each of their sides while he slyly moves over to the raised dinghy.

“That is a crime against your captain!” He yells, raising them up above his head effortlessly while you watch on with the biggest grin. “What is the verdict, my dear medic?”

You tamp down a laugh, matching his acting. “Sounds like the punishment is thrown overboard, my cap'n.”

Hobie winks at you, the girls scream as their dad ‘throws them overboard’. Their eyes widen at the treachery, but Finn, who has been waiting in the dinghy with arms open, catches them without a hitch. You exhale properly once they're safe and sound in his big burly arms. You trust Hobie and his aim, but you don't trust the wind and gravity.

The girls kick about, while Finn is unbothered, watching the bundles in his arms. “Thank you for catching them, Finn.” You say, climbing down on the dinghy with Hobie's hand helping you down. He grunts in reply, releasing the twins back into your arms.

The girls clamber their way into your lap, sending death glares at Hobie who sits down across from you. Finn gets out of the boat, slowly letting the small boat down into the tides.

“What?” Hobie asks, acting innocent. Billie and Mona huff at him, tiny fists wrapped around your (Hobie's) leather vest. “I was just followin’ orders! Your mum delivered the verdict!” They turn to you simultaneously, you stumble on your words.

“Mum!” Their furrowed brows would be adorable but they have the same fire in their eyes that you sport when need be.

“Sorry?”

It was an awkward rowing for only a moment until you placate them with chocolates that you've hidden under the seat just for the occasion. They've forgotten about you and Hobie's transgressions the moment they bit into the sugary treat.

Billie's the first person to rush into the sandy beach when the boat reached the island. She grabs Mona by the hand, giddily bouncing up and down in excitement. Hobie pulls the boat inwards while you watch the girls count their steps according to the map in their hands.

You follow behind, hearing their little arguments as they get turned around in confusion. Hobie's arm snakes around your waist, face tucked into your neck, sighing as his shoulders relax.

“Hi,” you smile, craning your neck to peck at his temple. “What are you doing?”

“Sniffin’”

“Ah, continue on, captain.”

After a beat, with you and Hobie spectating the twins, Hobie mumbles into your neck. “Do you remember the first time we were on this island?”

You smile fondly, still following the girls as they walk inside the lush greenery. The familiar canopy shields you from the sun, Hobie straightens up, hand sliding down to hold your hand. “I do, some of it was bad, but it was mostly good I think.”

He squeezes your hand, “yeah? It was all worth it wasn't it?”

The girls finally stop in front of a pomegranate tree that has fully blossomed. They pause in awe before noticing the red ‘x’ beneath their feet. They take the little shovels that Hobie made, excitedly pulling it out of their satchels, digging immediately with a grin.

You sniff, meeting his grey eyes. “It was. It was all worth it.”

Hobie smiles, arms finding penchant on your hips, pulling you close until you're chest to chest with him. You cup his jaw, his stubble making you chuckle as you rub gently along his jawline. He moves his head down to press a kiss against your palm, eyes never leaving your own.

You lean closer, heart thrumming, lips brushing along his own—

“We found it!” Billie exclaims, while Mona dances around the wooden chest that you and everyone who loves and cares for the girls have prepared for them. You two move away from each other quickly.

“What are you waitin' for?” Hobie matches his girls' energy. “Open it then!” The second they're occupied, he pulls you back into his arms, giving you a chaste yet saccharin kiss that leaves you breathless, that reminds you of the first time he kissed you under the moonlight.

[sharlotscarletfox]

My predictions for the Hogwarts Legacy DLC:

I live and breathe news of the DLC. In October 2024 we got news that it will have about 10-15 hours of new content which is a lot! I honestly can't even tell you how long the game takes (I have 350 hours of gametime) but 10 hours of extra content is a lot. The part i will focus on is the main story quest since side quests can be fucking anything from puzzle rooms to map treasures to helping out more students idk.

It will be called definitive edition so I think there is a good chance that they will add like an actual epilogue thing but it's hard to tell. The story does end with MC taking the OWL exam and Im pretty sure the school year ends after that so they could add like MC following some lead on one more repository or shutting down a side branch of operation.

Other than that we finally might be getting a whole new friendship quest to make up for the lack of Ravenclaw companion maybe Amit maybe not I wish he had more of a personality than just Astronomy. And dare I say Ominis quest honestly there is a LOT of content to explore in there but adding another Slytherin quest line seems cheating and they would have to tweak it so it fits with Sebastians story since Ominis is a huge part of his story every step of the way.

So that's my input on it either an epilogue to wrap up the story once and for all (since the sequel won't be a sequel to this game unfortunately) or a new relationship quest hopefully around a new/old Ravenclaw character or Ominis (Ominis unlikely tho).

Also a fun fact I have trouble waking up bc im not a morning person but one morning I saw fake leaks and it accelerated my heart rate enough to wake me up completely.

[to0-many-fandoms]

Some Batfam Head Canons

I personally believe that multiple batfam members have autism in varying amounts. Do I have autism? Maybe idk I can’t get an official diagnosis but I’m pretty sure I have some so please take this with a like a grain of salt

This post specifically is about Jason Todd, my current favorite batfam member

His main special interests are english lit, specifically classics, social services, and guns, more specifically their history

This man will pull quotes from any number of old books out of no where just to fuck with people. He will also just say random facts about the history of guns for like no reason.

I personally believe he has like less autistic tendencies? Idk if that’s the best way to put it but yeah, so he will use the other batfam members autism‘against’ them.

Like one day he wanted to make sure Bruce wouldn’t bother him so he got him a big bin of legos and just set him loss, one of B’s special interest is geography so he just started like recreating different maps and stuff. (Eventually Tim and Damian also became a part of this and the three of them have a designated room for a miniature model of just about anywhere they’ve been made of legos.)

This ends up being a way to say sorry without saying sorry as well, for both Dick and J but J uses it more. Like J will but more legos or buy specific one if he remembers them mentioning them.

The legos to distract thing also works on J but it has to be like the sets not just like loss legos. He also has a separate room for his lego sets.

J will deny he has autism, not because he’s ashamed or anything like that he just likes fucking with his siblings. When J claims to not have autism, and he has gotten into legitimate fights about it, his siblings laugh and make fun of him for his autism denial.

Everyone genuinely believes him when he denies he has autism until they are talking to Roy about it for whatever reason and Roy is just like ‘What are you talking about he told me like forever ago, I’m pretty sure I was one of his first calls when he got his official diagnosis because he was happy he had like hard evidence of it.’ None of them were very happy with him.

Also I have not read the comics, this is all from fanon vibes